Saturday, June 18, 2011

SELF ACTUALIZATION AND INDEPENDENCE

About 2 months ago, I wrote an article called “Till death do us apart”... This article was about Marriage and Relationships and the importance of knowing who we choose to spend our lives with. I have decided to repost one reader’s comment on the article and my response to the comment. Please feel free to read the comment and let me know your perspective on this topic as well...

Anonymous said... 

This is the year when most of us (those 86ers) turn 25. I am also seeing more and more friends starting to tie the knot, and get engaged. I loved the fact that you mentioned the fine print, I am finding that some folks I know are merely doing these things simply to say "am doing it" - despite ill treatment from there significant others? What do you think about those that get engaged/married despite mistreatment from a spouse? Simply because they are trying to stay enroute with "the plan" that all others are adhering to, that is to 1) finish university 2) get married 3) have kids? what about self actualization, independence etc.. Don't get me wrong, I strongly believe in accomplishing great things, I have completed my Bachelors and Masters before hitting 25, as well as maintaining a relationship, however, I think that such a commitment should be made with a person that truly makes you feel special, and for the right reasons, and not merely as a fashion statement. 

Me …

I think many individuals are too comfortable in their relationships, even when they know it's unhealthy. Many young women are scared to end their relationships because they worry too much of what others are going to say about them. Yes, it understandable if you're in a relationship for long but some individuals want to please everyone, so they would stick with the plan and "do it" despite ill treatment from their partners. There are many factors that may also plays into this . ex// insecurities.

Moreover, I do believe that self actualization and independence is vital. Realizing your potentials and capabilities in life is significant, but sometimes some individuals may achieve self actualization through their significant others. For example, there are some boyfriends/husbands that encourage and support their girlfriends/wives to reach their full capabilities.

I think self actualization goes hand in hand with Independence

However, how long is a woman going to obtain the "independence" status for ? Don't get me wrong, we all say we are independent and strong women because we work, graduated, make our own money and feel like we don't need anyone to satisfy us... but there are times we may need someone by our side just to comfort, encourage , enhance our self esteem and boost self-awearness

So, if we do find someone that support us in everything we do, than it will make us feel special for the right reasons.



**Express and Reflect on your World**


Sincerely,

Prissy Birago